Sunday, 15 May 2011

Winston’s May 2011 blog

Winston here . . . p’rrrrr, p’rrrrr . . .

I haven’t blogged for five months, don’tcha know. Have you missed me?

Akchalee I don’t know what months is. Is it food? I don’t think it can be ‘cos I don’t usually get no food when I blog, just my usual rations which I might tell you is a bit thin at the moment. That’s ‘cos I went to see Kate-the-Vet and after I’d made a BIG fuss of her and she told me I was gorgeous and had wonderful clean teeth she spoilt it by saying I could do with losing just a little bit of weight. Last year Nadia-the-Vet said the same thing and so Mrs Human put me on short rations. I had to catch spiders and flies to make up the difference, don’tcha know.  Do you remember?

Anyway, after a while, everyone (except Mrs H) forgot all about what Nadia-the-Vet said and went back to giving me treats when I asked for them. I ask very nicely and the Humans (except Mrs H) love it and tell me a little won’t hurt. I like it specially when Gillian comes ‘cos she really can’t resist my winning ways and offers to feed me and then she puts lots of food out for me and my tummy gets really stretched – it’s lovely! After that I just sleep and dream for hours and hours.
 Well, this time, Mrs H told Mr H that *I have got to lose weight (she keeps saying that and Mr H just nods and smiles) But she said, ‘I mean it, he’s got to be rationed,’ and Mr H said, ‘But he asks so nicely in the mornings and he really enjoys his bit of chicken/ham/cheese/shrimp/tuna.’ (That’s not all at the same time, course!) In the end he agreed and I was very disappointed, don’tcha know. I thought I had him proply trained. So now he gives me just one little treat and I have to wait for my breakfast before my tummy feels full again.

I tell you, I got so hungry the other night that I opened the cupboard door and dragged out the tube of shrimp treats and a bag of dog biscuits and I tried and tried to open them but I just couldn’t. Course, just before I went to see Kate-the-Vet, Mrs H cut my claws ‘cos I kept getting hooked on things. The other day I got stuck to a cushion and it followed me everywhere. Gus barked, silly boy and Mrs H laughed when she saw me though she tried not to let me see. So course I couldn’t get a good grip on the bag of biscuits.

I’m trying to work out how to get into the fridge now. The Humans have had fridge-raiding cats before so I’m sure I can find a way. I think if I sit and stare at it long enough it will open. I talk to it, too. Watch this space!

The other thing about having blunt claws is that I slide off things. Usually when I stretch up on Mr H’s legs I can hang on but now I just slip off. Never mind, my claws will grow again.

There’s a funny **red thing that appears now and then and I chase it but I can’t never catch it. It’s odd – it don’t smell or make a noise and I don’t know where it goes when it’s not there – or here. Gus don’t know nothing about it, neither and he can’t catch it, too. Mind you, he don’t move as fast as me.

The Humans know how much I love bird-watching so they very kindly moved the bird feeders closer to the house. I spend many a happy hour watching and chittering at the birds. I think they’d like to come and see me, too, don’tcha know, ‘cos several of them have banged on the patio door.

That’s all I’ve got. Be good!

TTFN
(Mrs H: 
* Winston's not very overweight ; he just needs to slim down a little!
**It’s a laser light)

I'm linking to Misty Dawn's Camera Critters and Bozo and his human at Pet Pride.                                            

13 comments:

  1. You made me laugh... here's hoping you can slim down a bit!

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  2. heya winston... sure is good to cya once again!! and you are one smart cat!! love ya!!

    Woof woof
    from Bozo
    Pets forever

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  3. Winston, you're a very handsome fellow -- I don't say that about a lot of cats, but you're way cool!! I love my treats even when Mom points to my stomach and shakes her head!!

    Sam Schnauzer

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  4. Patches likes chasing a laser light too. Come to think of it, Patches likes to chase just about anything. She lives for playtime.

    Patches enjoys watching the birds too. We have privacy screen on the windows in one of our rooms. The birds come right onto the window sill. Patches loves it!

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  5. I thought it would be a laser light. LOL
    Poor Winston. Lindy understands how he feels. When she looks all cute and begs for treats, she gets vegetables. Fortunately, she loves vegetables. Somehow, I don't think Winston would want cucumber, broccoli, cauliflower and zucchini, would he?
    — K

    Kay, Alberta, Canada
    An Unfittie's Guide to Adventurous Travel

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  6. Awww poor you being put on a diet. Hmmm, me and Simba could send over secret rations if you like hee he :)xx

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  7. Nice to hear from you Winston. I am sorry to hear you are on short rations but it is probably for the best! I am glad Mrs H told us what the red thing is!

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  8. It's good to hear from you again Winston. Miss Cindi Lou is also on short rations and not at all happy about the lack of treats but she needs to lose a tiny bit of weight too.

    Cindi and the kittens also like to chase one of those red things, but they can't catch it either.

    Miss Sissi sends you purrs, she says you are very handsome.

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  9. I had a cat growing up, but now the only thing we have is a goldfish ... or rather, we need to replace it. If I had to pick I like cats over dogs.

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  10. Winston, I feel your pain. I hate diets too! You look very handsome in the photos. Your eyes are gorgeous!

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  11. That's really a long time ago ! Poor Winston, my cats don't understand either why they have to be slim like models instead of certain women in certain countries. Rubens also loved round women and not skinny once. Arthur is so happy that Mr. Mortadella is back and he gets treats again, but for the moment he is rather slim (Arthur not Mr. G) he runs around too much so all the winter fat has disappeared.
    Anyway, Arthur and diet doesn't work, he meows non stop with his Hitchcock voice or he just goes to the neighbors and plays the starving cat !

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  12. I sure know how Winston feels. I'm on short rations, too.

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  13. I think your cat is gorgeous as is :)

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