FOLFIFOAP
Do you suffer from folfifoap? Have you ever caused someone to experience the folfifoap, either deliberately (I hope not!) or unwittingly?
It is not a pleasant sensation and can show itself in many ways. For some, it results in stuttering and stammering. (Stuttering and stammering mean the same thing, but stuttering is the term more likely to be heard in Australia, Canada, and the US. Stammering is mostly used in UK, Ireland, and Singapore.)
In other people, folfifoap causes blushing, while yet others are reduced to speechlessness. This is uncomfortable, particularly in an interview situation, where the onus is on presenting oneself in the best light possible.
Most professionals do their best to put those who may be feeling insecure or nervous at their ease, but in some cases, this leads to further embarrassment or discomfort.
Is there a cure? I doubt it. The only way to overcome Fear Of Looking Foolish In Front Of A Professional (FOLFIFOAP) is to equip oneself with as much knowledge as possible about a particular subject, event, or dilemma, and build up one’s self-confidence.
FOLFIFOAP is what keeps me quiet and in the corner at gatherings (if I go at all) where people chat away with ease on subjects I know nothing about (almost everything) mostly politics and sports and fashions as well as the latest thing in TV shows and "did you see...?"
ReplyDeleteI'm a fly-on-the-wall person, too. If I could get away with wearing a paper bag on my head, I would!
DeleteHMMM.... Actually? I'd rather most people suffer through FOLFIFOAP than (TTMPTYKWYTAWYD) "try to make people think you know what you're talking about when you don't."
ReplyDeleteOh, I agree - there's nothing worse than a windbag!
DeleteThe best way to avoid that fear is by listening instead of talking. I am not sure when it became shameful to say, "That's not something I am familiar with " and then simply listen.
ReplyDeleteI agree. I'm an expert listener. 😉
DeleteAs far as I know, not something I suffer from.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad.
DeleteRaising my hand
ReplyDeleteI could have bet on it! 😁
DeleteA good rule. It is better to stay silent and let them think you are stupid than it is to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely. Impress with your listening skills . . .
Delete"Best to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt!" There is a lot of wisdom in that quote.
ReplyDeleteThat is so true.
DeleteI assumed stammering was caused by neurological issues in the part of the brain that produces speech. And therefore not able to be cured or even improved.
ReplyDeleteSpeech therapists can do such a lot to help stutterers and stammerers. Have you seen 'The King's Speech'? Many people learn to cope with and even overcome stammering through singing or acting. It's a fascinating subject.
DeleteI've had to overcome a lot of that in discussions with the builder and architect;. soldier courses, telescopic vents (we need 4, apparently), DPM, are just a few..
ReplyDeleteIt all becomes a word soup after a while, doesn't it? As long as you end up with what you want, all will be well.
DeleteSmile!! Best to remain silent, as AnvilCloud says! I'd be sure to end up dropping a ton of bricks and putting my foot in my mouth however much I googled beforehand
ReplyDeleteConfidence its the key. People can spout all sorts of rubbish if they do it confidently. Just think of some of the people in the news today . . .
DeleteNever experienced this. On the contrary, I enjoy being around people who know what they're really on about, and find it fascinating to learn from them. Instead of pretending I know as much as they do, I will ask questions. If someone asks me something I can't answer, I'll freely admit to it.
ReplyDeleteListening to experts talk about what they love is always exhilarating.
DeleteListen and learn.
ReplyDeleteAlways good advice.
DeleteI've not heard of that before, it doesn't bother me if people talk about something I don't know.. I just smile and wait for them to pause and move away!
ReplyDeleteIf they're boring, that's the best thing to do.
DeleteGod, all the bloody time, I prefer to listen, that way I'm safe.
ReplyDeleteLikewise. Be like the wise old owl.
DeleteTwo ears, one mouth
Delete👍
DeleteI used to blush every time I opened my mouth. Less often now I am old. Joy. but a bit late in life!
ReplyDeleteIt's called 'growing up' and eventually we all do, though some of us are still waiting . . . 😉
DeleteThank you for explaining folfifoap. I had not heard of it before, though many of us experience it!
ReplyDeleteIndeed we do.
DeleteI'm pretty sure that I have had this problem in the past. These days I'm less inclined to care how I look. I'm glad you did explain what it meant otherwise I would have never figured it out.
ReplyDeleteSome people have the knack of making others feel inadequate.
DeleteI don't have the fear though I have often looked foolish in front of people.
ReplyDeleteHaven't we all?
ReplyDeleteGreat post 👍
ReplyDeleteThank you.
ReplyDeleteI was once frozen speechless in front of a palm reader by the line of questions she was asking me, with friends present. I suppose that counts.
ReplyDeleteNot that a palm reader is really a professional! LOL
DeleteIn my book, a professional is someone who knows more about their subject than I do, and that makes most people professional. 😉
DeleteBeen there, and I never knew there was a term for it (even if it's an acronym.)
ReplyDeleteI made it up . . . 😳
DeleteOne of my greatest fears!
ReplyDeleteI know, and it's so silly really. We're all humans and we all have strengths and weaknesses. 😧
DeleteYou made me puzzle about that damn word until the end of your post. I did some interviewing for new staff. It must have been intimidating to be interviewed by a group.
ReplyDeleteSome interview boards set out to intimidate, or at least it seems that way. It's not the best way to assess candidates.
DeleteI was wondering what that stood for.
ReplyDeleteIt's fun to make up acronyms. 😁
DeleteI am pleased that I do do suffer from folfifoap because I have been taking anti-folfifoap medication for the past three decades.
ReplyDeleteIs it working?
DeleteNo. Because you can see that I wrote "do do"!
DeleteFile it under never miss an opportunity to keep your mouth shut - CJ
ReplyDeleteNMAOTKYMS - good thinking but a lousy acronym .. . . 😁
ReplyDeleteMost professionals... those who don't attempt to put clients at ease deserve to be dragged out and shot! (or at least telieved of their professional post)
ReplyDeleteWe agree!
DeleteSometimes, though, asking what at first seems like a dumb question is a good way to sort the real experts from the wannabes. The really smart people that I've met don't mind simple questions as they like to help all listeners understand, whereas some of the smart arses can't handle this.
ReplyDeleteQuite right. The truly clever people can speak on all levels to all people.
DeleteI didn't know what that acronym was....but, I never know what they are...my mind just doesn't think that way. I've used wrong ones too...eek...I'm the last of 6...I had to speak, tell jokes, look silly to be seen and heard - I don't have this...ahaha
ReplyDeleteWe all do what we have to, and who's to judge, anyway?
ReplyDelete