Thursday, 23 February 2012

The Adventures of Frodo the Faller (2) reworked

This is a reworked post in response to interest shown by some of my commenters.




Deciding that the dog show world was not for our beautiful naughty boy was a blessing in disguise. Frodo had not started his Falling career at that point so we, or rather I (for my husband is patient with my wild dreams and ambitions but does not commit himself as readily and foolishly as I) was regretting his foreshortened profession as a Top Stud Dog since to achieve any success or even desirability (in the eyes of breeders/owners, that is; I don’t think the brood bitches care one way or the other what their mates look like) he would have to be paraded, sorry, exhibited, at many a Championship Show in order to gain his ‘tickets.’



Now to the general public tickets mean travel but in the rarefied atmosphere of the Dog Show World they mean kudos for the breeder/owner and the chance for the male dog to get his leg over. The bitches stand to be ‘served’ and it doesn’t seem like a very enjoyable experience for them. Unfortunately, they cannot lie back and think of England. In addition they have to suffer the indignity of being ‘tied’ for anything up to an hour, twenty minutes being the average.




This is the time when free-mating dogs in public can find themselves doused with cold water as shocked humans who find the whole process disgusting and even more so when displayed by dogs and cats, attempt to separate them. A torrent of water merely panics the dog and bitch who cannot escape from each other even though, soaking wet and cold, that is probably their dearest wish. It’s Nature’s way of ensuring ejaculation and impregnation.



On one occasion many years ago we had a dog and bitch mating. In our innocence we thought we would be able to keep our recently acquired three-year-old ex-stud dog away from our six-year-old frothy bitch. (We now have our female dogs spayed when they’re young!) He was much wiser than us! The resultant tie was observed by our eldest daughter, then nine years old. It didn’t have a damaging effect on her though she did enquire whether it happened to humans!



In my imagination Frodo had achieved and excelled in all the necessary stages of his calling and had become Sovereign Top Dalmatian, indeed Supreme Super Stud of the Natural World, were there such a title (though there’s much that’s rather unnatural and ill-advised in the Canine Canon – consider that the tiny Chihuahua and the stately Great Dane are both descended from the wolf!) I had not considered how I was going to manage his active life as a Dog in Demand. Where were the matings to be performed? Should the trysts take place in the kitchen or maybe the conservatory? How was the bitch to be accommodated during her stay? Perhaps the spare bedroom would suffice.




Even more, I had not thought about the times – and there certainly would be some – when his services would not be required. Did we really want our boy humping everything in sight, including our other dogs, our cats, the furniture, my mother-in-law’s legs?


No, Frodo the Stud Dog was really a non-starter, particularly when he began his Falling career, of which more anon.

19 comments:

  1. Hey this is great - you have suddenly appeared in my reader!!All of the bitches I have ever owned have been spayed - I just couldn't cope with hordes of litters ... but my border collie was kept in tact. He was fairly well behaved but there was one particular temptress up the road that drove him bonkers when she came into season. Having only had bitches before I couldn't work out what was wrong with him the first time I witnessed his demented pacing. His mind was still making appointments that his body couldn't keep when he was 15 years old!

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  2. The dogs are beautiful. And I may have to use the term "frothy bitch" in a story sometime - in a completely different context ;-)

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  3. Wonderful story, Janice. I love Frodo, as I've most likely mentioned, most likely often. Now I hope Bertie isn't intended to be a show dog, or a champion stud.
    K

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  4. Very active and so good looking.

    Greetings,
    Filip

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  5. I can't wait to read more. Too bad for Frodo that he missed out on being the town stud.

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  6. All have been 'fixed' here. Best way, I think. I could never give any puppies up, so this would make me a crazy lady with dogs. LOL.

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  7. After our bitch became the neighborhood slut we were quick to spay her *she was under 6mos the hussy, her first time, and all other bitches in our brood. Our first ever dog, and Irish Setter was a non-compliant bitch and never wanted thing to do with a stud of any kind and went wonkers when we tried to breed her. Spoiled us for the rest of the bitches in our family.
    You've got me hooked....can't wait for the next installment!

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  8. Well, he looks like a champion Dalmatian to my "not dog show eyes." Now I will have to go back and read about this falling career you mention!

    By the way, your prose is very entertaining, especially the line about lying back and thinking of England!

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  9. My brother who kept dogs for a long time has told me about the bitches suffering when "served". I still shudder. Fascinating read, though, even for a non-doggie person, so that's quite an achievement!

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  10. A fascinating story about Frodo. It coincides with my
    watching the big dog show last weekend on CNN, I have a first cousin who has bred, shown and painted flat head retrievers , her last project making bronze
    sculptures of her faves. She lives in Gloucester and has a website. I am sure she would appreciate your
    stories! I like the serial idea for writing about your
    experiences owning a dog.

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  11. So glad my non show dog is neutered! :)

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  12. Love it! And those dogs are gorgeous.

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  13. Not only I learned something about "love" making between dogs, but also that a female is called a bitch, I mean a part from the human once I didn't know that the origin of the word came from female dogs. Our dog Bianca was spayed but still attracting all males in all sizes from the neighborhood and while Mr. G. put up a fence around our garden and told our neighbor how safe she would be now, she had a relationship with the neighbor's dog ! See she was a bitch !

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  14. I think Frodo is lucky to NOT be a show dog anymore. :)

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  15. Chuckling all the way through ;-)

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  16. In a related story, our love birds have 9 eggs in their nest.

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  17. I don't know what falling is, but I hope it is happier for all concerned!

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  18. I've had the ambition of breeding and showing dogs, but it has always seemed like too much work.
    Frodo is a beautiful boy. He probably could have been a star stud... if not for the falling, which would have been a big problem.

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  19. Great story! Frodo is absolutely gorgeous! :)

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