Monday, 19 December 2011


Image copyright Lee Friedlander 1966

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With thanks to Tess Kincaid. Click here for more Magpies.

Thursday, 15 December 2011

ABC Wednesday V is for . . .

Verbena is also known as Vervain. Sweet-scented, it attracts butterflies and bees.
Veronica (Veronica longifolia)
Viola 'Jackanapes'
Violet (Viola odorata)
Violets and veronica grow like weeds in our garden and spread further each year. This delights me.

Click here for more Vs

Sunday, 11 December 2011

Magpie Tales #95 The Fisherman

Image by Mostafa Habibi
Taking the path to the village along the cliff the old fisherman paused in his customary place to view the sea. The rowing boat caught his attention immediately - a dinghy cast up on the shore, oars shipped. No footprints on the smooth sand, no body drifting in the water, no sign of life anywhere. The tide crept closer, rocked the craft, yet it remained as though anchored. No seabirds wheeled in the air or pecked along the shore line and that was unusual.

The old man clambered down a narrow path to the beach. He wanted a closer look - there might be someone lying in the hull. He stood for a long time, watching, listening, before approaching the craft. The sand sucked at his boots and a sea mist crept in towards land, the dampness infiltrating his layers of clothing. He was not a fanciful man, indeed was known and respected for his practicality, but a sense of dread was growing in him.

Reaching the boat he peered in. There was nothing there. He chuckled and turned to retrace his steps. There were no footprints in the sand.

They missed him in the village, sent out search parties when days passed without sight of him, but he was never found. No-one claimed the dinghy and it soon drifted away. If anyone noticed the faded name they thought nothing of it. ‘Reaper’ wasn’t a local name.

Click here for more Magpies


Saturday, 10 December 2011

Central heating on the blink

The old boiler – not me! - aged gracelessly. With the passage of years it became increasingly temperamental, even cantankerous - perhaps me, after all;-)

Some days it would work, on others it refused to wake up at all. This made the approach of winter a matter of concern as temperatures dropped. Eventually it died and had to be sent to the great gas boiler graveyard.

Fortunately we have multi-fuel log burners and were able to heat our sitting room and conservatory. An immersion heater took care of the hot water but moving from the warmth, nay, tropical heat of one room to the Arctic regions of the rest of the house transported me back to my childhood when chilblains were the order of the day. It wasn’t as bad as that, of course, but one must allow for poetic licence.

Paul and John arrived on Monday to replace the gas boiler.
Out comes the old boiler
It might be butchered to rescue any useful parts, unlikely as that seems!
 Copper pipes going nowhere - the hole ensured that the garage was well ventilated!
 As usual, it was not a straightforward job, and the weather had turned very cold so they were working in many layers of clothes, with hoods up – the boiler lives in the garage. A good cooked breakfast in the morning and hot chocolate at regular intervals helped to warm the inner man and almost stopped them turning blue.
'Hot chocolate, drinking chocolate,
Hot chocolate, drinking chocolate'
I liked the Cadbury's advertisement but this chocolate was Charbonnel et Walker - yum!

Barry stoked the fires and kept them burning hot, hot, hot. The sitting room fire resembled a blacksmith’s furnace and I expected any moment that Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego would come walking through the flaming coals to join me.



There were three children from the land of Israel
. . Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego

They took a trip to the land of Babylon
. . Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego

Nebuchadnezzar was the king of Babylon
. . Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego

He took a lot of gold and made an idol
. . Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego

And he told everybody when you hear the music of the cornet
And he told everybody when you hear the music of the clarinet
And he told everybody when you hear the music of the horn
You must fall down and worship the idol
. . Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego

But the children of Israel would not bow down
. . Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego
You couldn't fool them with no golden idol

So the king put the children in a fiery furnace
He heaped on coals and red-hot brimstone
Seven times hotter, hotter than it oughta be
. . Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego
Burnt up the soldiers that the king had put there

But the Lord sent an angel with snowy white wings
Down in the middle of the furnace
Talking to the children 'bout the power of the gospel
Couldn't even harm a hair on the head of Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego
Laughing and talking while the fire is jumping around

Oh Nebuchadnezzar called when he saw the power of the Lord
And they had a big time in the house of Babylon
. . Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego

Paul and John were staying with us. Now this is not a service we offer to all men who come to work in our house but Paul is our son-in-law. I was worried that they would be cold at night. Yes, we kept them working all through the night and didn’t allow them indoors until the job was done. No, we didn’t – they slept in the cold bedrooms but were perfectly warm and comfortable under the duvets.

Barry and I roasted in our bedroom – the chimney goes up through our room* and we had the dogs and Winston with us. Our pets like to share their love and company with everyone and enjoy moving freely from room to room. Paul and John needed their sleep so we kept our door closed so that they wouldn’t be disturbed by nocturnal visitors.

*I wouldn’t like you to run away with the idea that we have a stove pipe running up through the centre of the room, rather like the one on George Stephenson’s steam engine. 
George Stephenson's 'Rocket' 
image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons
The chimney is enclosed within a wall, all neat and tidy – one of the few things in the house that can be so described.

Once the work had been completed in the freezing garage the rest of the house became the work space. Hose pipes were attached to radiators to drain them and then thermostats were fitted. After that the radiators had to be bled. What a strange expression that is. Whenever I hear it I imagine specialised leeches attached to the metal to suck out the life force. 


Strange whistlings and gurglings filled the air, towelling mopped up any spills and Paul and John rushed from room to room and from radiator to radiator to discern emanating warmth. Finally the system was pronounced in full working order and the men went home to Dorset. We have been basking ever since in the warmth that permeates every corner of our abode.

Meanwhile, Bethan and Robert were burgled, but that’s another story.

Robert Popper aka Robin Cooper

I think this might be a good night out!


Friday, 9 December 2011

Liam Lynch - Tush it

This is brilliant!

The Spider in Barry’s Eye

The morning Barry woke up with a spider in his eye it was sufficiently convincing to make him try and swat it away but it wasn’t a real arachnid. When he started seeing flashing lights he hot-footed it to the doctor who suspected a detached retina and tried to arrange an emergency hospital appointment, only it was the Day of the Strike, which turned out to be a bit of a damp squib. Stores nationwide reported a significant rise in their takings. However, hospitals were only admitting life-threatening emergencies and Barry’s predicament wasn’t urgent enough so he had to wait until the next day which meant that he had to cancel his luncheon appointment in London.

It was probable that he would have drops in his eye/s which would make his vision blurry making driving difficult for him and dangerous for fellow drivers! Therefore, as I was expecting to drop him off, I drove the twenty minutes or so to the hospital, which was not good exercise for my shoulder.  

As with most hospitals, or so it seems, a slow queue of cars inched towards the already full car park. I wasn’t intending to enter the car park but there was no way past the queue. We had agreed that Barry would register for his appointment, he would find out how long he might have to wait and let me know. If it was likely to be a short time, generally an unlikely scenario, I would stooge around and pick him up. If longer, I would go home and await his call. He was informed that he would have to wait at least an hour so I drove home, wincing all the way.

I had just beaten off over-excited dogs, principally Gus, who cannot tell the time and thought he’d been abandoned for at least twenty-four hours, and eaten a sandwich when Barry rang to tell me he was waiting for me to collect him. I clambered back into the car, pointed it in the direction of the hospital and gritted my teeth for the drive. 

The good news was that Barry’s retina was still firmly attached. Some of the vitreous gel had leaked causing the spider effect. His brain will eventually block the spider, just as it does floaters. I have learnt not to ask how the spider is . . .

Nonetheless he was advised that should the flashing lights recur with partial blanking of vision he must return post-haste to Accident and Emergency.

At the same time the central heating went on the blink – but that’s another story! 

So why have I been conspicuous by my absence?

So why have I been conspicuous by my absence?

Well, first of all there was NaNoWriMo. My hairdresser was interested in it and my dentist offered to review the finished article.  I didn’t take him up on his offer.

Having achieved the magic number (and a little more) I floated around in a bit of a haze – that is to say, more of a haze than usual.  I had noticed a niggling ache in my shoulder for a couple of weeks but disregarded it until it became impossible to ignore because pain was radiating down my arm. I recognised that as referred pain.

If you remember, early in the year I was impersonating Long John Silver minus the parrot, crutch and peg leg. Looking at illustrations of LJS I notice that some show him with just a crutch and others with a crutch and wooden leg and yet more with a peg leg and no crutch. In some he is missing the left leg and in others it is the right leg that is no more.

I digress. At that time, in the dewy days of the New Year, the referred pain in my leg was comparable to that of sciatica.

Suffice it to say that the soreness in my arm was remarkably similar, waking me at night and making me prone to grizzling during the day – I say ‘prone to’ but I assure you I was a brave little soldier and didn’t yield to the temptation. For a few days I was to be seen with wires sprouting from my clothes as Compex (electrostimulation) alternating with TENS (Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulation) machines did their damnedest to deaden the pain. On occasions I turned the levels up so high I was jumping like a frog in a dissection dish.

I tell you this, not to elicit sympathy but to explain why I was unable to dazzle you with my scintillating wit; quite why I need to explain this I have no idea for the said wit has never dazzled yet and is unlikely to do so in the future. (That’s a cheap play – or should it be ploy? – to make you gainsay me!) Using my arm was difficult and so I refrained from using my laptop. Also, I’d used up all my thoughts . . . J

Then Barry woke up with a spider in his eye – but that’s a different story.

Wednesday, 7 December 2011

Tales from the Academy – Change Parade

In the far-off heady days of the early 60s traffic was light and cars drove fast quite slowly and had no seat belts or heating. Their suspension was basic or non-existent and brakes were either fierce or ineffective.  Those cadets who were not rich but could (just) afford an old banger would chauffeur their enthusiastic fellow cadets to the bright lights of London after the week’s tribulations were done.

A weekend away was fun and often exhausting so that Monday morning’s rude awakening in the far too early hours was a shock to the system of the cadet about town. On parade his sleepiness might bring him to the attention of the Sergeant Major who had a unique way of waking him up.

‘Change parade,’ he ordered and the cadet doubled into his room to change uniform. Presenting himself on the parade ground he was immediately ordered to ‘change parade’ whereupon he would quick march back to his room to undress and dress again in a different uniform. Back in front of the warrant officer he would hear the order, ‘Change parade’ and would go quickly to his room to switch uniforms once more. This would continue until the officer on parade decided the unfortunate cadet was now fully awake and attentive and could rejoin the ranks of his more alert brother cadets.

It may sound harsh but however tired an officer may be he must always be vigilant on duty and the staff at RMAS took and continue to take their task of training young cadets very seriously.

Today’s cadets have a much shorter training period but still must learn to cope with weariness – their lives or the lives of the men and women they command may be at risk. Thus, when fatigue threatens to overwhelm and they feel sleep overcoming them, they are told they must stand up. The lecturers are accustomed to seeing one after another cadet standing up in their lecture rooms. If cadets have been on exercise for a few days it is probable that lecturers are faced with a roomful of young men and women standing and attempting to absorb what they are being taught.

ABC Wednesday - U is for Umbels

Umbels resemble umbrellas in that all the flower stalks radiate from a central point. This can be seen much more clearly once the seed heads have formed.
Candytuft (Iberis umbellata)with visiting beetles
Candytuft belongs to the Brassicaceae family. It is a pretty, scented annual, flowering in summer, its colours ranging from white through pink to purple.

The leaves, stem and root are thought to have medicinal properties but the seeds are the most effective part of the plant, being used in ancient times to treat rheumatism and gout.

In modern times it is considered to be effective in treating cardiac hypertrophy (enlargement of the heart muscle), asthma and bronchitis. It is a homeopathic remedy for nervousness and muscle soreness.
Alliums are also known as ornamental onions - the name doesn't do justice to their beauty!
Agapanthus (African lily, Lily of the Nile)
These tall showy perennials originate from South Africa and are not lilies at all but belong to the Amaryllis family (Amaryllidaceae) The colours most commonly seen are blue, from pale blue to deep purple-blue but there are also white and pink varieties. I understand they are despised as weeds in New Zealand. Here in UK they are treated with care to produce the wonderful umbels that fascinate from earliest emerging bud to the final fling of colour and production of seeds. Can you tell that I love them?
Lonicera 'Copper Beauty'
We have several honeysuckles in our garden. 'Copper Beauty' is evergreen and very vigorous. New leaves are a coppery bronze and the flowers are a rich yellow with a red base. It is reputed to be fragrant but ours never seems to have much scent. However, it has to compete with sweet-smelling roses, other fragrant honeysuckles, jasmine and lilies.
The yellow of the blackbird's bill and eye ring reflect the colour of Copper Beauty's flowers. The flowers are succeeded by black berries that the birds enjoy, pulling them off with great energy.

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Friday, 2 December 2011

ABC Wednesday T is for Thrush and Titmice and Tomatoes

Song Thrush (Turdus philomelos)
The Song Thrush or Throstle has a loud rich song of musical repeated phrases. It is slightly smaller than the Blackbird (Turdus merula) and shyer, often being chased off by its larger cousin.


It is a partial migrant, some birds moving to lower ground in winter, some flying to southern Europe, many staying put. It suffers badly in harsh winters - in 1963 its numbers declined by 60%.


Despite its fabled habit of smashing snails on stone 'anvils' I have seen this only once in our garden. More frequently I see them pulling worms from the ground but they also find handy meals on the bird table and the feeders.
Blue tit (Parus caeruleus)
Of the seven tit species only four visit our garden. The blue tit is the one we see most frequently. Blue tits are acrobatic little birds, a joy to watch as they hang upside down on feeders or delicate plants. They feed on insects, caterpillars, seeds and nuts and any scraps that are put out for them. Blue tits often frighten away their smaller relatives, the coal tits.
Coal tit (Parus ater)
Coal tit with blue tits
The coal tit is the smallest true tit. It eats beetles, moths, flies and bugs in all their forms, from egg through larvae to adult and also spiders. It also eats seeds and small nuts. 

Like the blue tit it nests in holes in trees and makes a cup-shaped nest lined with moss and feathers. It will also nest in holes in banks or walls.
Great tit (Parus major)
Blue tit and great tit
The great tit is the largest tit, and, like the other tits here, widely seen throughout the UK, absent only from the Northern and Western Isles of Scotland. It can be aggressive with smaller tits at feeders.
 Long-tailed tit (Aegithalos caudatus)  
Long-tailed tits with blue tit
The long-tailed tit always reminds me of a shuttlecock. Its tail is longer than its body.It's a pretty little bird, rarely seen singly, more often in small groups of four or five. The nest it builds is lined with two thousand feathers. Long-tailed tits are very susceptible to cold because they are so small. In hard winters 80% of the population may be lost. Flocking and huddling together helps to alleviate this.
Tomato (Solanum lycopersicum) 
We try every year to grow this sweet tasty member of the nightshade family. We don't have much success so we really appreciate the fruits that do manage to ripen.
Tulip (Tulipa) 'Queen of the Night'
We have much greater success with tulips and this one, 'Queen of the Night', is a particular favourite.

To see more tantalising Ts click here

Tuesday, 29 November 2011

NaNoWriMo No More

I reached 57078 words today, decided that was the end of my novel and submitted all 40 chapters. I suppose it will disappear into the ether now.

It’s called ‘The Sweets and the Bitters of Love’ (thank you, Lord Byron) and it ended up being a romance, which was quite a surprise to me.
 
What can I take up now to avoid the housework??

I still can’t work out how the NaNo site made it 57238 words, though.

Another thought – shouldn’t it be InNoWriMo – International Novel Writing Month? Last time I looked UK wasn’t part of the USA where NNWM originated ;-)

Monday, 28 November 2011

Help for Heroes rugby match

The Heroes Rugby Challenge  is taking place at Twickenham on Saturday 3rd December in aid of the charity 'Help for Heroes.' 


Tickets are being offered at two for one, a great deal and for a very good cause. The atmosphere will be electric as a Southern Hemisphere XV takes on a Northern Hemisphere XV. More information can be found here.