First day at Big School

 

First day at Big School

Children starting Big School for the first time yesterday will have been excited to see the latest post box topper. The clever, thoughtful creators have been hard at work again. Look at those big, fat crayons, just right for little fingers. You can almost smell the wax!

‘Big School’ is what we call the first ‘proper’ school our children attend. It’s an exciting time for four-year-olds and an expression that has been used for better or worse in the year(s) leading up to that momentous occasion in September.

 Big School may be used as an inducement to encourage acceptable behaviour, as in, ‘You can have X, Y, Z when you go to Big School if you A, B, C. (Fill in your own bribes!)

Naughty children – are there such things these days, or is that too damaging? – well, then, children who are not cooperating with their parents or carers, are told, ‘You won’t be able to do that when you go to Big School’.

It may be said in tones of disappointment - ‘I don’t think anyone will think that’s very clever/funny/kind/grown-up at Big School.’

I like the googly eyes on the post box!

So Big School is built up in the child’s mind as a wondrous place full of Big People ready to praise or disapprove of them. Those who have siblings will take all the blather with a huge pinch of salt. They have seen their brothers and sisters return from school unscathed and know that it’s all in the noise and it’s just the grown-ups trying to maintain some sort of control.

So the little ones trot off to school in their smart new uniforms, socks pulled up neatly, new shoes blindingly polished, shiny faces wreathed in smiles with not a hair out of place – some may even be wearing pretty ribbons. Holding tightly to Mummy’s hand, (for the sake of argument, we’ll say it’s Mummy) they skip along, chattering happily, eager and a little apprehensive, even the worldly-wise ones with the older, experienced siblings. They reach the classroom door, go inside and find their pegs with their names on, it’s all new and thrilling . . . and then they have to say goodbye. Some will part without a backward glance, but others will cling, chin wobbling, tears threatening, as they realise they’re going to be left in this big unfamiliar place, even if they’ve been in and out of the school for years with their siblings.

No matter how well children have been prepared for this day, the reality strikes hard, for Mummy as well. This is the 4-year-old’s first step into the big, wide world, having to acknowledge another adult’s expectations. The end of the day is an unimaginably long way off.

Those whose children have parted from them with astonishing aplomb should not feel too self-congratulatory, for once a small child realises that the excitement of school is not just for a few days but what seems like FOREVER, the tears come, perhaps three weeks after the start of term. By this time, the nervous children have settled happily and look askance at their previously assured peers. There’s always at least one kind child who will offer comfort, and sometimes it’s to the now distraught parent as well.

Being told that such behaviour is perfectly normal and children survive, the tears drying as soon as the adult has left, is little consolation, but these tribulations pass.

The end of the first day comes and anxious parents wait to greet their youngsters, but what’s this? The children rush forward, shoes scuffed, socks at half-mast, untidy hair sticking to hot, grubby faces, a grazed knee or two. Can these rascals and hoydens really be the same beautifully-turned-out children of the morning?

Everyone has survived and tomorrow they’ll do it all again and it will become another of life’s routines. There’s often one child, though, who will be disappointed.  ‘He thought he’d be able to read,’ said one mother apologetically after her son’s first day. That little boy did learn to read, after about three days, but that’s unusual. Another might say, ‘I’ve been to school,’ not realising it’s an experience to be repeated for several years. Reality is so hard to take!