Sunday, 12 January 2025

Someone else’s expense

 

Someone else’s expense

I am not posting a photograph of Barry’s face – it’s not a pretty sight. The swelling is going down and the bruising is going through the usual repertoire of interesting colours.

He had to have the dressing replaced on Wednesday and came home with a huge plaster covering half his face. That’s a slight exaggeration, but he was more aware of it than the original, as it was clearly visible in his peripheral vision. It reminded me of Cyrano de Bergerac, for no plausible reason. It fell off in the night!

On Thursday, we made a Heath Robinson attempt to cover the developing scar. It’s stayed put, with additional plasters to keep various wandering ends in place, and now he looks as though he could take the lead rôle in The Phantom of the Opera.

Another plaster was added today, at right angles to the Thursday dressings. Talk about using a sledgehammer to crack a nut! At this rate, his entire face will be obscured. 

As it is, strangers are commenting on it when he’s walking the dogs, showing great sympathy. It’s more acceptable than the rude remarks coming from me! It’s not good form to laugh at someone else’s expense . . .

This morning, the padding of a fresh plaster was peeping out annoyingly and Barry appeared with scissors and asked me to trim it. He had tried to do it himself, but he's a southpaw, so sometimes finds scissors awkward. It was funny, because as I advanced with the scissors, I sensed him backing off nervously. That made me laugh, which caused even more tension. He muttered something about not wishing to have his nose further adapted. 

We find our entertainment where we can!

61 comments:

  1. I'm sure you care about Barry and will look after him well.

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    1. I do, even though it may not sound as though I do!

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  2. Poor Barry! It's good that you find laughter in it, better that than crying.

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    1. The thing is, he can laugh about it, too, though the plaster is annoying him.

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  3. Laughter is healing even when you're in the midst of things.

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    1. He has a robust sense of humour, luckily, sometimes inappropriately. 😁

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  4. I too am a southpaw and I struggled with scissors (and a lot of other things, right, Barry?) until my husband's father, a jewel of a man, found and gifted me with left handed scissors. Oh the joy. Hope the face heals fast and well!!! Goodness.

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    1. He doesn't have too many problems, but it was trying to use the scissors in front of the mirror that foxed him. Youngest daughter is also a southpaw. I find left-handers so interesting to watch and was always aware of them in the classes I taught.

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  5. Be very careful with those scissors so close to the eyes.

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    1. I think that was Barry's thought, too! 😎

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  6. Barry is deeply traumatised with all the bandages on his head. The rapport and humour between you two can only come from a strong connection

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    1. I'm sure he's going to need some therapy after all this . . .

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  7. Hmmmm familial medicine is cheap and close to hand, but I am not sure it is the best care available. I hope the scar and bruising clear up very soon!

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    1. Hels, speaking from experience, no doubt.

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    2. It's only replacing a dressing, so not very difficult. Getting the plasters to stick is the hardest part!

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  8. I am sure I could entertain if I approached Barry's face with scissors in my shaking hands.
    I go to bed with two bandaids at right angles to the one covering the spot on my chin.

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    1. Yes, shaking hands would not inspire confidence. I hope your plasters are working. Should that spot still be bleeding?

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  9. Poor Barry, I hope he gets his face back soon...

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    1. It would be an improvement on the current situation, certainly. 😉

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  10. Oh dear Barry, the things you put up with!

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    1. I know, and I'm the worst of the things . . .

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  11. Laughter together keeps you together, hubby had his nose done years ago and came home with, what looked like tampons stuffed up there, giggles all round, he laughed at me when I came home with a huge bandage to cover a small scar, I'm allergic to plasters, so it was way over the top to keep it in place.

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    1. Years ago, a surgeon looked into Barry's nose and said, 'Oh, dear.' It needed some sorting out after boxing injuries.

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  12. Poor chap - hope things sort out quickly. xx

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  13. Oh no, trying to trim on the bandages are we. I'd be a little worried about the scissors getting too close to my eyeballs. Hope things start to heal quickly though.

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    1. It might not have been so bad if he hadn't chosen the kitchen scissors . . .

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  14. Photo documentation may be a good idea. not to post, just to have. A sort of "Ahhh remember the laughs and the joy walking the dogs, frightening the neighbors, scissors, at the ready , good times!" Heal well, Barry!

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    1. I'm surprised that so many people have commented. It's true it's hard to ignore, but Brits are usually so reserved and uptight!

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  15. Poor Barry. Sometimes you have a choice between laughter and crying - usually laughter is the better choice (something I also need to remember).

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    1. Definitely - not always easy to remember!

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  16. I am glad that you are finding the light side amidst your troubles. I am glad you folk still say 'plaster'. I was brought up to say it, but bandaid is more ubiquitous here. There is little hope for us colonials. Or should it be 'we colonials'.

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    1. Americanisms are overtaking the mother tongue . . . Keep up the good work!

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    2. bandaids for me too because plaster is something we smear on the walls when patching cracks etc.

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    3. Ha ha ha, Elsie! Thank you for the good laugh this morning. 😁

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  17. The descriptions of your attempts at dressing the wound are hilarious, even if Barry might not see the humor in it just yet. It's good to find some light moments in the midst of a challenging situation, though I can see how he might not appreciate the Phantom comparisons. The dynamic between you two seems to bring out some laughter even in the most unexpected circumstances!

    I just shared a new post; let me know what you think. Have a lovely weekend ahead.

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  18. As Tim and I say, 'if we don't laugh, we'll cry'. Poor Barry. PS: I cannot say this without 'hearing' it in Glenda Wilkenson's voice from "The Last of the Summer Wine'.

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    1. 'The Last of the Summer Wine' is priceless!

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  19. laughter is healing, hope it works quickly on the nose. I do the same to bob, he has had many, many cancers removed, including 5 melanomas and some of them were huge.
    tell Barry, he was right to cringe, bob has been cutting my hair for 40 years... a few months ago, while trimming around the ears, he snipped my top of earlobe and it bled like I had been stabbed in an artery. the past 6 times he has cut my hair I cringe every time he nears and ear and also pull the top of the ear down flat and pray he doesnt get my fingers... we too laugh a lot. I did not laugh at the snip.. the only time in 40 years. he is 88 and ill, and trembles. now we fight over if i go to the hair dresser or he does it.. no laugher on that one either. there is almost always a fun something about bad things, if we look for it after we wait a while

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    1. Poor Bob - I bet he couldn't believe he'd snipped your ear. It must have hurt.

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  20. Poor Barry, and naughty Janice to make fun of his predicament :-) Well, at least he's in good hands with nurse Janice (I guess) ... xxx

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    1. It's surprising how often one's guesses can be wrong . . . 😉😃😁

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  21. I am guessing that Barry won't be leaving the house for a while.

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    1. He's taking the dogs out every day and lots of people are stopping to talk to him - well, as many 'lots' as can be found in the forest - say, three or four!

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  22. I hope Barry feels better soon.

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    1. Thank you. He doesn't feel ill or uncomfortable, just irritated by the way the plaster impedes part of his vision.

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  23. Poor Barry, hope he feels better soon.

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    1. He says he feels as though his glasses are slipping down his nose, even though he's not wearing glasses! 😎

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  24. I think a little humour often helps in many situations.
    Wishing Barry continued good, and as quick as possible, healing.

    All the best Jan

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    1. It will be interesting to see how much of a scar there will be. He's had several bits chopped off over the years - fair skin and time spent in hot climates . . . 🌞

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  25. Oh dear, I have a lot of sympathy for Barry. But sometimes a little humor is in order to relieve the stress of it all. I do wish him speedy healing.

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    1. Thank you, Denise. He's a cheerful soul . . .

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  26. Hi Janice - poor chap ... always the worst place to have an affliction - however it came about ... yes all the best to him particularly - cheers Hilary

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    1. Not easy to ignore, but probably just as well . . . 😎

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  27. Poor Barry. I know you had his best interests at heart and he had asked for your help, but I can still feel his trepidation!

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    1. It was quite funny, because he's such a confident man, but he had chosen huge kitchen scissors, too. 😁

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  28. I had skin cancer removed from my nose in Greece and they recommended some medication to apply after the cut had closed and stitches removed which reduces the appearance of scarring. There are various varieties available but the little tube of something like silicon gel you might use to seal the bathroom was what they told me to get. It works wonders and isn't obtrusive in appearance while doing it's job. Sorry I can't provide the brand - it's still in the bathroom cupboard in UK.

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    1. Thank you for the information.
      He's been told to apply Vaseline, but I remember one of my grandsons had a birthmark removed and used a special ointment to prevent scarring. It was in the centre of his chin and looked rather like a little beard - not a happy look for a toddler. Now, of course, he's 26, and there's no scar, but no-one would see it anyway as he's grown a neat beard!

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